It's far too late for all this

I really should be in bed but I'm on the couch typing a blog at two in the morning. I've always said that I refuse to complain or grouse about my condition and that hasn't changed, I just want people to know how it creeps up on me when I least expect it.

The other day I went fishing, I go as often as I can because it's not far to the bank of the river and once I'm in the river, wearing chest waders, I find I can walk really well because of the bouyancy. Normally the day after my legs feel better and I can get around a bit better, but not any farther. The other day was no different right up until I had to walk back to the car, I thought it would be the same as always but I was wrong. Every step I took I thought would be my last, every ten yards I had to stop and rest, this was more difficult because feilds aren't level. When I got back to the car, which was parked only fifty yards from the river, I was really on my last legs.

This is what happens every month, I think I'm doing well and my walking gets better and all of a sudden it's all gone and I'm back to square one. This is why I can't sleep now, because my whole body is twitching and spasming and cramping and I know I'm well on the way down.

Now normally I'm a fairly happy sort of a person but all of these things really get me down, not in a 'oh my god I can't cope' way, more of a mental fatigue kind of way , where it's almost too much trouble to think. Even right now I'm finding it really hard to concentrte on what I'm doing right now, my eyes are heavy and my limbs are sore, I feel hungry all the time even though I eat like a horse. I seem to get abdominal pains for no aparent reason, so no matter what way I lie down I can't get comfy.

I feel like I'm blathering on about nothing but right now I'm really tired and keep losing my train of thought. There are some things that are harder to get used to than others and right now I can't remember wheather or not I felt like this last month, but I reckon I must have. I really should re-read my blog sometime and see if I can timeline these things.